Possibilities

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You once told me how drawn you are to skies because its vastness tells you that there’s so much more beyond us.

With that, I’ve realized that everything that we have yet to know and feel is everything that I want to experience with you.

I’ve always thought that falling in love felt like an instant short of breath or fireworks ringing in my ears. But maybe there is a different kind of love, one that grows on me, one that may not arrive in the most lavish and outrageous manner, but one that arrives quietly, slowly, in the smallest but surest of steps. And maybe that’s the kind of love I am already feeling with you.

Jump

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I think it’s quite ironic that most people try to make sense of what love is, when love is really supposed to be something easy. But we portray it as something tragic and unattainable, and something that could lead to our ultimate downfall. We question its existence, its power, and even our capability to acquire it for ourselves and for other people.

Maybe it’s the circumstances which surround love that make us believe that it’s horrible - the fickle nature of humans when one decides to lose emotion for the other or love someone else, the universe’s wrong timing, proving that two people are not right for one another - when love in itself is actually crazily beautiful.

I know that these circumstances can’t be exclusive of love. And they aren’t that simple either, because life just isn’t. But if we’re lucky, these circumstances can actually go according to our wishes. They can help make us better people. They would come and evolve at the right place and at the right time.

These circumstances would lead to a love that is right, that is nurturing and that is perfect in its own way.

Perhaps it’ll come after a horrible break-up. Or the death of a loved one. Or a time when we’ve decided to give up. Maybe this love never come, and that should be fine too.

But maybe we’ll be ready when it does.

To better things

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“How does it feel to revisit something you once walked away from?” he asked.

There is something that will make me reach for it again, I said, but it’s different. I seem to have forgotten what it’s like to be in that beautiful and tragic place. It’s familiar and warm, but it’s also sad. Nothing seems to belong anymore.

Even so, I long for it. Just a little bit. There will always be a longing for it because it used to be a part of me. It used to consume me because it was the most important thing in the world. It gave me purpose. ‘This is it,’ I would say. I was wrong.

I figured we never really get it right anyway. And maybe we’re wired that way, missing everything and everyone. But we don’t tie ourselves down to that kind of thinking either, especially when it doesn’t make us happy anymore.

Because like everybody else, I eventually left and moved on. It takes a lot of time and a lot of heartache to see it, but we move on and we find it.

We move on from certain dreams and certain wishes. We move on from moments and from each other.

And contrary to what we thought, it actually does get better.